In a recent article, Justin Coulson describes how kids have grown increasingly dependent on their smartphones, making them stop caring about their kids while scrolling through their soccer games, basketball practices, or other similar activities. They want to know that their parents are interested in their lives and how they are treated.
No one raised a finger when he polled parents at a workshop to ask them if their phones were more significant than their children.
Unfortunately, I’ve even seen this over the centuries: parents who have a greater addiction to the smaller screen than their interactions with their kids. And it goes both ways. Children rarely respond to their parents ‘ cellphones when they place their faces in them.
For example, over the past several years, we have seen event after event showing that the “kids are no alright”, especially among teens, whose rates of depression, self-harm, material abuse, and death continue to rise at alarming rates.
The issue has gotten so bad that Virginia governor is in charge. Glenn Youngkin just , signed , an administrative order banning phones in the state’s K-12 institutions. Different states are considering implementing related measures.
Why has this happened? Beliefs are” caught, no taught”, and children are often some of the greatest observers in the world. They are more likely to do the same if they see their kids hidden in their cellphones and disregarding their interactions, creating a pit of isolation and loneliness that both parties will suffer from.
The Institute for Family Studies , reports , that” about 1 in 7 parents of teens ( 15 % ) said they use their phones or other digital devices ‘ almost constantly’ during conversations, meals, or family events”. They are burying their faces in their windows and refraining from interacting with the most significant people in their lives, with disastrous consequences, instead of engaging with one’s spouse or children.
If both parents and their children have their heads buried in a handset, it shuts down all face-to-face connection, which is necessary for a child’s long-term personal well-being. It gives them the assistance they need to develop and grow, as well as helping them develop social skills, foster empathy for people, and gain the support they need.
This is more crucial than ever as our children are more susceptible to distractions and peer pressure from social media and smartphones. They need families to get current individually, not almost.
Thus, I do not think it is a mere coincidence that the current “loneliness”  , epidemic , afflicting our country coincided with the introduction of the handset. Instead of engaging in meaningful face-to-face interaction, we retreated to 140-character” tweets”, Facebook and Instagram “likes”, and acronyms such as” LO L”.
People, particularly those who are families, need to go on a modern diet to get rid of the toxins from our smartphones and get our attention once more on our relationships with our children and those around them.
Parents should continue to use the good features of smartphones, such as chatting someone when they are late or when their spouse needs to pick up something for them at the grocery store. Some travelers have saved themselves from getting lost by using a GPS rather than trying to read a map while driving. What it means is to put the phone down for trivial things and let our kids know we care more about them than how many people like us you get.
Fortunately, some of our children are beginning to realize this, either reducing their time on their devices or ditching them immediately.
” Young people themselves are kind of self-censoring and saying,’ I do n’t really need the negative mental health and social harms that come with an always-connected life,'” said Greg Hoplamazia, academic director of emerging media at Loyola University Maryland.
Families should follow fit now.
But if we want to interact with our kids, let’s detach from our phones. This encourage our kids to detach also, start talking instead of messaging, and concentrate on long-term relationships instead of immediate gratification. Instead of just checking in on our kids ‘ Instagram or Facebook pages to find out what’s happening in their life, this make it a priority to question them.
Parents and children may discover that real-life joy may begin to be felt with both themselves and those around them rather than just through online “likes” as well. That benefits both our nation as a whole and our families in particular.
Timothy S. Goeglein is the author of the book Toward a More Perfect Union: The Cultural and Moral Case for Teaching the Great American Story ( Fidelis, 2023 ). He serves as vice president of Focus on the Family in Washington.
