I am aware that I am not speaking to a significant person when I hear someone discussing political solutions. —George Carlin
The later, great standup comic had a stage: Many of the political problems we argue most passionately about — crime, the economy, the environment, learning, national security — are n’t issues that we can ever resolve. There’s no end line to achieve. Instead, it’s more akin to pain management for an uncomfortable, middle-aged up: It’s constantly going to be an issue, but if you stay ahead of it, you may also enjoy a very good quality of life.
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Homelessness is, was, and will always remain an emotionally gut-wrenching political horror. When you’re a kid, losing the security and security of your home — or by expansion, your families— is definitely your most intuitive phobia. Other than starving to death ( and/or being devoured by monsters ), you could n’t imagine anything worse. Poverty was one of the first social issues I became aware of when I was a young child. It was terrifying.
Rush Limbaugh noted that the poverty problems comes and goes depending on who’s in business: When the GOP’s in cost, it’s a big problem, when Democrats take over, it kind of gets swept under the rug. That’s because these poor, downtrodden ( and generally mentally ill ) street people serve a higher purpose for the major advertising: They’re flesh-and-blood accessories to advance the liberal plan.
Furthermore, the more dire you perceive their plight, the more sympathetic you’ll be to a Big Government solution.
” Homeless advocates are n’t ]just ] satisfied with comparing the homeless to the Virgin Mary”, Limbaugh wrote in his best-selling book,” The Way Things Ought to Be”. They want to use them as tools to demonstrate that America is a compassionate nation.
Still, it’s always sad when people struggle. Props or not, every single man, woman, and child living on the streets is deserving of basic human dignity. Images of large, sprawling homeless camps are just heartbreaking. ( Dangerous, too — especially for women and children. )
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However, the issue is still unresolved: there were homeless families then, there are still homeless families today, and there will undoubtedly be more in the future. Clearly, none of the prior solutions were effective. And since we’re all out of good ideas, I’d like to throw my idea into the mix: Give each homeless person a camel.
First of all, camels are probably good for companionship. Everyone needs a friend. ( Plus, it’ll be a funny conversation opener on Hump Days. )
Second, and far more crucially, this way, the entire homeless problem would disappear overnight. Seriously: Just like that!
Because instead of being homeless, now they’re nomads.
Is n’t that nice? Simply by redefining words and meanings, we can solve the ongoing, never-ending, heartbreaking problem of homelessness.  ,
( Hey, if we can redefine gender, we can certainly redefine nomads. )
When we encounter a homeless person on the street, we no longer have to look away, staring in sadness and shame. Instead, we can point him out to our kids, using him as a positive example:” See that man, Timmy? That’s a nomad. They’re a noble breed, proud and true. Where he goes, nobody knows! Now let’s get some pie”.
Look, we’re well beyond the point of rational solutions. It’s time to try something new, bold, and ( highly ) experimental. So, if you really care about the homeless, please send a letter to your neighborhood congressman asking him to support camels for the homeless. Those poor people have suffered enough, give’ em a camel, for crying out loud.
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Besides, what’s the worst thing that could happen?
Even if the program is a complete failure, at least the homeless could survive on the camel and survive.
