The withered mind that once belonged to Joe Biden addressed the British people for the very last moment on January 1st.
( We hope. )
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The same tenacious leader who also insists he was function effectively for another four years ( and would undoubtedly have defeated Trump)! struggled through his speech, twisting thoughts and swallowing vowels with Hawk Tuah-level skills. Yet the 2017 Atlanta Falcons were of,” Bro, that’s a poor way to finish”.
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But it was a repetitive efficiency. From beginning to end, it was firmly Bidenesque, completely encapsulating the Man Who Knew To Little. Almost instantly, Smokin ‘ Joe did exactly what you knew he’d would.
Initially, he boasted about the Hamas-Israel peace, dislocating his head patting himself on the up. It wasn’t simple, he would’ve crawled over areas of damaged glass to state funds. Still, I’m really glad those hostages will eventually be freed. ( As for the hundreds of evil, violent terrorists that Israel had then release in return, I had a thought: If they don’t have TVs in Jewish prison, even those morons haven’t been watching the news and don’t know about Hezbollah. So, maybe Israel gives the terrorists some free beepers? )
Biden acknowledged in an unintentional and unexpected moment that this peace deal was the same one he had suggested many, many months ago:
Now, after eight months of daily negotiations, my leadership, by my leadership, a stalemate and a captive deal has been reached. the components of which I covered them in great depth in May of this year. My staff and I created this program, which will be mostly implemented by the incoming administration.
Okay, but Biden’s plan hadn’t changed. Israel is unchanging. Hamas are still the same beloved hamassholes. The only thing that’s changed is the next leader: Trump gets to green-light missile hits in five weeks. Doesn’t it basically look like there’s a direct relationship between Trump’s returning to D. C. and the unexpected anguish of terrorists to prevent a drone-date and a dirt-nap?  ,
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But hey, maybe that’s just a silly coincidence. Maybe Biden is just so tough, he wore’ em down. Yeah, that must be it.
The rest of the speech was vintage Joe: Plenty of self-aggrandizing nonsense, some assorted gibberish, and an absolutely astounding absence of shame.
One month after he pardons his child, Joe Biden would demand in his farewell address that we” show the courage to stand up to the abuse of power”!  ,
That’s chutzpah on steroids.  ,
There was more: A clever D. C. speechwriter remembered Ike’s farewell remarks about the “military industrial complex” and juxtaposed them with today’s Big Tech. Biden called it the “tech industrial complex” — kind of. If you go by the transcripts, that’s what he called it, and I gotta give the speechwriter props: That’s a good line and a cool phrase.  ,
It has legit propaganda potential.
But unfortunately, Biden is such an inarticulate communicator, he was difficult to understand. He garbled the line. He trashed the gold the speechwriter gave him.
Biden also made a whiny about social media “giving up on fact checking.” Well, the “fact checkers” were working for Big Tech! They were the ones who censored speech and kept secrets from the general public. Seems contradictory to warn of the “tech industrial complex” being too powerful, but then complain that it needs to be more intrusive and restrictive.  ,
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As he stumbled, bumbled, and fumbled through his finale, most Americans felt a combination of emotions. First was a very real sense of sadness, and I’m not being facetious. Witnessing the president’s deterioration and diminishment was sad.
We all grow old. We all die.
But second, there was a profound sense of release: Whew! We made it through! We survived!
Sure, the East Coast might be invaded by drones. And okay, the West Coast’s on fire. But finally, we can close the page of the Biden presidency.  ,
At long last, our favorite moment of the Biden presidency has finally arrived: The end.
