Last month, Brittany Patterson, a mother of four, was arrested. Her crime? For a short period of time, she did not know where her 10-year-old son was, and he walked less than a mile from home. According to local police, “anything could have happened.” Patterson’s lawyer and many parents and commentators have come to her defense as a mother who gave her son age-appropriate independence and did not neglect or endanger him.
Lenore Skenazy broke the story at Reason, and Patterson’s case sparked another national conversation about “free-range parenting.” Free-range parents are not just up against other helicopter parents and anxious Karens, but now must also take on an overreaching government and a bully police state.
The Facts of the Case
According to Skenazy, the incident occurred on Oct. 30, 2024. When Patterson needed to take her eldest son to a medical appointment, she could not find her 10-year-old son, Soren, and his phone was not working when she called. The family lives on 16 acres outside Mineral Bluff, Georgia, a town of 370. The boy’s grandfather lives on the property and his grandmother and other relatives are nearby. Patterson assumed he was with family or playing in the woods, which he does often, and left.
Later, Patterson received a phone call from the sheriff. It turned out Soren was not on the family’s property as she assumed. Without telling his grandfather, the boy decided to walk the mile into town to the Dollar General. A woman saw Soren walking alone, became concerned, and asked him if he was okay. He responded that he was, but she called the police anyway.
When Patterson heard that her son had walked into town she said, “I was not panicking as I know the roads and know he is mature enough to walk there without incident.” The sheriff argued, “he could have been run over, or kidnapped or ‘anything’ could have happened.”
Patterson returned home, scolded her son, and assumed that was the end of the incident. Later that evening, however, the 41-year-old mother was handcuffed, put in the back of a cruiser, had her mugshot and fingerprints taken, and put in jail.
Patterson said, “I was shocked, surprised, disbelief,” Patterson said. “Couldn’t really understand what was going on or why. “They told me to put my hands behind my back and then I had to ask to tell my children goodbye.”
The warrant states that Patterson “…willingly and knowingly endangered her juvenile son’s bodily safety.”
Courage in the Face of Government Overreach
The story about a mother arrested for letting her son take a walk may sound shocking, but it is not the first of its kind. Patterson found attorney David Delugas, who is defending another mother arrested for letting her 14-year-old daughter babysit her siblings.
According to Delugas, Patterson was presented with a “safety plan” proposed by Georgia’s Division of Family and Children Services, “which included using a GPS tracking app on her son’s phone.” The assistant district attorney suggested that if Patterson signed the “safety plan,” the criminal charges would be dropped.
“If you call a document a safety plan, maybe what’s in it ought to make the child more safe,” Delugas said. “And by the way, that assumes he was unsafe in the first place, which he was not. Part of why Brittany declines to sign it is he wasn’t unsafe.”
If the state decides to prosecute, Patterson could face up to a $1,000 fine and a year in jail.
What is a Normal Parent to Do?
If reading these stories sends a chill down your spine, you might be a parent who encourages prudent and age-appropriate independence in your children. You might not watch your 10-year-old every minute of the day. How do you defend against overly concerned onlookers and unfounded fears of potential kidnapping? (Skenazy notes, “statistically, you would have to keep your child outside, unsupervised, for 750,000 years for them to be likely to be snatched by a stranger.”)
Recognize you are not alone. Delugas took on her case pro bono through his organization Parents USA, which defends free-range parenting and parental rights. Skenazy, who became known as “world’s worst mom” for letting her nine-year-old son ride the subway to school by himself, founded Let Grow, an advocacy organization aimed at encouraging and defending children’s independence.
In addition to national organizations like these, there are other families across the country who encourage healthy independence. Many parents share concern over the anxiety epidemic for kids who are tracked by GPS and overly monitored without developmentally necessary independence. A few considerations to help you on the way to raising healthy children:
- Get to know your neighbors. There is no substitute for friendly, in-person interaction with the people living around you. Once you have a face and a name, your neighbors are much less likely to be inordinately concerned about a 10-year-old practicing skateboarding in the cul-de-sac. Developing rapport with the people in your and your kids’ day-to-day life reduces the chances of misunderstanding and overly concerned neighbors inserting emergency services that are needed elsewhere.
- Remain calm and confident. If someone does call the police for one of your parenting decisions, it’s helpful to remain calm. Let Grow offers a list of tips and considerations for dealing with questions or concerns from strangers or authorities. Parenting is not yet a crime. Sanity and reason are on the side of prudent judgment encouraging children’s independence.
- Keep the big picture in mind. Do not succumb to fear. Most likely, your 10-year-old will not get in trouble for going into the grocery store alone for a gallon of milk while you wait in the parking lot. Most likely, you will not face arrest if your 12-year-old bikes down the street to see a friend. They need these activities!
These were, until now, not considered risky activities. Now, they do carry the risk that an overly concerned person who is not used to seeing a child unaccompanied by an adult at all times will call the police. It’s worth taking that risk. Children will not suddenly become fully functional adults at age 18 or 21. They need progressively more independence and less supervision over the course of their whole childhood in order to arrive at adulthood equipped to meet the ordinary challenges of life.
Do not give into fear and leave your kids inside playing video games so that no one will bother you. Your children deserve nothing less than a full and active life.
